Setting: The hallway of the West Monroe Tinseltown
Characters: mab, RayRay, and a middle-aged man known as Mr. D. He is wearing hunter green plaid pajama pants, a bright green Rayville High School hoodie, a tan fishing vest (stuffed with pens, business cards, some random wires and cell phone attachments, and who knows what else), and a leg cast. Neither RayRay nor I are wearing pajamas or a vest made up of 8 overstuffed pockets.
The following is an excerpt from tonight’s conversation:
RayRay: Look, mab, who I found in the men’s restroom! It’s Mr. D!
Mr. D: Do you mind if I lean against the wall? I broke my leg.
mab: Whoa! I didn’t even notice that? How on earth did you break it?
Mr. D: You would be surprised how many people look you in the eye and never notice your leg. Do you have 5 mintues for me to tell you the story? I was helping a guy get rid of his 500 pound Zenith tv at the dump. Before we picked it up out of the back of the truck, I reminded him that I was on the church safety committee. I told him to put is legs shoulder-width apart and to lift with them instead of his back. Proper lifting technique is key. We bent down, picked up the tv, and he promptly fell off the truck and on his head. I dropped the tv on my leg and broke my tibia. But, adrenalin is a crazy thing. I didn’t hurt at all then. Five days later my wife got tired of hearing me complain and I went to the doctor. Infection had set in and they said they would have to amputate it. Good thing they didn’t. I had to put on these pants because my wife wouldn’t let me wear my flaming Superman pants to the movie theater. (At this point, he pulls up his hunter green plaid pants to reveal his Superman-emblem-made-of-flames pajama pants underneath. I’m glad his wife wouldn’t let him wear these to the movie theater. That would have just looked silly.)
Mr. D is a hoot. He was funnier than the movie and the movie was pretty dang funny.