Here is my translation of a conversation I had with some neighbors a day or two ago….

Neighbor 1: Hey mab! Wow! You’re getting big! You must be due soon!

mab: Yup. About 6 weeks left.

Neighbor 2: Is it a boy or a girl?

(What mab wanted to say: I’ve told you that 30 times. You need to work on your listening comprehension.)

mab: It’s a girl.

N1 and N2 look at each other in a puzzled manner.

N1: Are you sure?

mab: Yes. I have had many ultrasounds. They all say it’s a girl.

N2 turns to N1 and says: But she looks like she’s carrying a boy.

N1 (to N2): You’re right. I mean, her stomach is a pimple. It’s a boy.

N1 & N2 in unison: No, you’re having a boy.

(What mab wanted to say: I’ve been to 1 ultrasound technician & 4 different doctors — including a specialist — for 6 ultrasounds — including one that is 4D — and my child has not been shy for any of these visits. We are all sure that it is a girl. And did you really say pimple?)

mab: No, I’m pretty sure all the doctors are right.

N1 & N2: We’ll see.

(What mab wanted to say: We’ll see? Yeah, because my stomach is somehow pimple-like, all of the doctors must be wrong. Y’all are crazy.)

mab: I sure hope it’s a girl! She has too many pretty pink dresses to be a boy! Have a nice day!

(What mab muttered under her breath as she went on her way: ‘We’ll see’ my big fat behind! That’s full of crap, oh yes it is. I guess all of my smart doctors are idiots. There’s no need for ultrasounds… just see if my belly is a pimple and tell me if it’s a girl or a boy. And did they really say pimple?) 

Later I looked up the word they used. It is related to the word for pimple, but it means a sharply-defined protrusion. This is exceedingly puzzling for me…

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