Today we all went on a really cool boat trip. We cruised through an archipelago and stopped periodically to swim. We saw an island named Chicken Island and one called Naked Island (what's up with naming places "Naked?"). We ate some amazing fried fish that they cooked on the boat. We watched seagulls fight for the leftover fish. But, is that what this post is about? No. It's about the Most Amazing Bathrooms in the World!
So, when we left the port city and headed home, we stopped about halfway for a potty break. This "rest stop" was in the steep hills on a blind curve. The roadside was lined with stalls all selling the exact same thing: olives, olive oil, olive oil soap, anything else you could make out of olives, pomegranate vinegar, and dried apricots. There was a dinky little cafe where you could get tea. And then, there were the Most Amazing Bathrooms in the World!!!
Unfortunately, I did not have my camera with me, since I do not make it a habit of taking my camera to the bathroom. So, my word pictures will be all the imagery you'll get.
Side note: About 99.9% of all public restrooms here are squatty-potties. That means they are a glorified porcelain hole in the floor. Anyone who is confused about these restrooms, their usage, or the resulting lack of cleanliness that surrounds them (literally) may ask questions later. Now, back to The Most Amazing Bathrooms in the World!!!
The door opened and one of my friends emerged. I took one last breath of fresh air (a requirement before entering any squatty), and entered. It was a very small stall made out of ceramic tiles with the squatty in the center and a teeny sink on the side — all of this is normal. The AMAZING part? Stapled, hot-glued, siliconed, and otherwise attached to every available space on the wall were dolls, toys, flags, silk flowers, pictures, and even a radio! Several of the toys were operated by motion sensors. So, as I walked in, they greeted me with a whistle and "I love you!" I'm not sure about you, but I've never been greeted this way as I entered a bathroom ever before in my life. I could hardly do my business because I was paying more attention to the plethora of plastic adhered to the walls and ceiling. There were even plastic flowers attached to the drain in the sink so that it looked as if they were growing there.
We paid about 30 cents for the priveledge of using this pot, and I think the attendant uses all of his proceeds to decorate. As I emerged from the Most Amazing Bathrooms in the World, the attendant whistled and said "I love you!" (Don't worry, all of my friends and my hubby were standing there with him. Which perhaps makes it even more disturbing.) I think this is one of the few English phrases he knows. He's learned it from the bathroom dolls. He then showed me each of the 4 stalls — decorated in a variety of styles. The one on the end — a men's room — he was most proud of. He showed off the plastic figurine of a very large woman in a bikini taking care of her business on a toilet. No, you did not misread that sentence. I didn't even know people would make items that tasteless. It's vulgar and tasteless on so many levels……
The attendant then proudly told us that his bathrooms were on the national news and were known all over the region. He also welcomed any photographs we wanted to take. Unfortunately, time would not permit me to go back to the van and get my camera. However, if you come to see us in the summer and want to take a wonderful boat trip like we did today, I'll take you there. Don't worry, we'll definitely let you stop and see the Most Amazing Bathrooms in the World!!!